Saturday, August 23, 2003

 
This is what I like:

Friends who come over after the hoedown is done at ten. And then they stay till 3 in the morning talking with you. Yes. Natalie and I stayed up till three last night talking about relationships, lack of relationships, and a bunch of other stuff. It was so good. I was sad when it was over...

but i was nervous about sleeping with my new earring, but i was so tired at three that I just laid down on my back and BAM. asleep.

Friday, August 22, 2003

 
weeeeee. done!


 
I'm so glad to be baaaaaaaack!

New student stuff going on. Girls moving in, new students EVERYWHERE. Yesterday we had an opening session of explanations, us PAs planned our skit for the all-dorm meeting Sunday night. BBQ on the lawn. Knighting ceremony (lots of cheering going on there), freshman "mugging", movie on the lawn under the stars. And we've still got three more days left. yeesh.

I'm so glad to be baaaaaaaack. YAARRR!!! MY GIRLS ARE HERE. April visited last night. After she left Tai, Natalie and I sat in my room for an hour or so just talking, and i told Tai about walkabout... and it was just a good time. I'm so glad to be back, and that everyone else is back. Tai went to bed and Natalie and I sat in the hall reminiscing, putting our legs up on the wall and bending ourselves in half. Then we decided we should choreograph something like that, like synchronized swimming. and i said "I feel like i need nose plugs" and natalie said "and and really bad waterproof makeup.. and swimming caps" and i said "And sequined bathing suits!" HHAHA we were laughing so hard... but all of this conversation was in whispers cause it was almost 1 o'clock and people were sleeping, so all of our talking was hushed and so was all of our giggling. Good, good times.

the saddest part was when natalie had to leave to go to her HOUSE. The last two years she's been around all the time..... and now she lives in a house. poop on her.

I think i'm getting my ear pierced today. I'm really scared... whoo it's gonna hurt. Tai is going to go get her lip pierced again and she was saying she had no one to go with- and i wanted to get my ear done anyway.. and then natalie's going to go with us also.

MAAAHHH i'm scared. Ibprofun is my friend.


Wednesday, August 20, 2003

 
A special note to Natalie:

I LOVE YOU TOO!! My roommaaaaaate. I miss you and i'm so excited that we get to be together sooN! (together is a very relative term, as you know, living over in Rainier house).

That Brandtson song has really been my anthem this summer, and i think it'll be my anthem for this fall, too. I posted it up by our hall bathroom...

i FEEL like new beginnings, and i'm convincing myself that this year will be unlike the previous two. I have a hall chalk (?) full of new girls.... 13 girls i don't even know (3 of them i do know), and i'm so excited to build relationships with them. I'm on leadership this year. I'm ready to do well in my schoolwork. It's a whole new resolve to simply strive to be better.

We talked about this in our PA training. The goal of the school is to be: Christ centered, excellence driven, people focused and future directed. And I'm taking that on as a motto for myself. And you know what? once you follow the first one, the rest of them fall into place.

I'm ready for this. are youuuuu?

"Here's to new beginnings
here's to something more
here's to you and your dreams
and everything you've
worked so hard for
here's to all the places
we've never been before
here's to summer tours
and hardwood floors
to you and your's"
- Brandtson ;)

 
i should be in bed, but i'm not quite ready yet...

I wanted to do a small recap of my summer the other day (yesterday?) but the internet was down, so i couldn't.

It's funny because I left school in May, and looked back over the past school year and saw absolutely nothing. I felt it was boring, that i hadn't changed, and somewhat dry.

And now i look back over this summer and I'm so excited because so many things happened. So let's recap, shall we? (do you guys actually read these long entries?)

I left school to move "home" to a two bedroom apartment with my parents. Not only were my parents there that weekend, but also joel and rinda and Hannah. I got to sleep on the floor. Rinda graduated, there was mother's day. And then for the next two weeks I babysat Hannah M-F and then M-Th, from about 7:15am to 4:30pm.

it was SO wonderful. I am so so so happy i had that time with Hannah before they permanently moved to K Falls. I got to sit with her in that small apartment and hold her for so many hours each day. There were literally times when I was sick of watching tv, so i would turn it off, and stare at her while she slept. (oh gosh. now i'm crying.) I was really reminded during that time how precious and unique we all are. We never usually feel that way, but as i studied Hannah I wondered about who she was going to grow up to be, and what she was going to call me, and what she would look like on her first day of school. The endless possibilities just in Hannah's life alone are so amazing.

Ummmm.. then after that i nannied.... and then we moved into our new place and a few days later my dad and i left with the youth group from our church for Mexico. AMAZING time.. it was really wonderful. I loved getting to know the kids in the youth group better. They were a great group of kids who worked really hard, and i was really sad to come home. The best part was when we got home and having the kids share about their experiences, and having them ask "okay- when are we going back?" i'm excited for a trip next summer!

Then i came back... and i worked some more.. for a month. Joel and Rinda came up fourth of july and we went to a rodeo!! woo! that was fun. Later in the month April, Tom, Michele and I went to the Scottish Highland Games which are ALWAYS enjoyable. Too bad it was really really hot that day and made it LESS enjoyable than its potential.

August 4th i moved back into my dorm room... the 5th we left for walkabout. I haven't really talked about it on my blog. I think i've talked to most people about it that actually read my blog. It was a really frustrating week for me. Ever since I've come to college i have said "I will not be on leadership because i think there are other ways besides walkabout to train leaders"... and I still believe that. But I wanted this PA position so bad that I went on Walkabout. (THIS HAD BETTER BE A GOOD YEAR!) umm.

So it was a tough week. It was hard for me to be the slowest person in the group. It was hard for me socially... when we got into our small group it was a lot better, but when everyone on leadership is around I get into a zone where I just don't want to talk to people.

The only highlight of the trip was that i loved my group SO much, and was so grateful for being in it. I don't know how i would've been in another group... God definitely placed me there for good reason.

But it was still a hard week... really really a lot. There were times when i just wanted to cry and go home, and i wanted to flail my arms and yell "WHY ARE YOU MAKING ME DO THIS CRAP?"

And it's hard to come back to a campus where everyone is so gungho about walkabout. Everything thinks it was the greatest week ever, and we're having to talk about what we learned on walkabout.

And the whole week all i could think was "the only thing this walkabout is telling me that i'm a horrible person." I was really down on myself most of the week and i don't see that as a healthy thing at all. All I knew was that i was slow, and I was filthy and I couldn't keep up with the rest of the group. That tends to make one feel like crap rather than "oh wowie! look what I did!"

I was so glad to get back. Except I came back to "So what did Walkabout teach you?" and i have to make up some contrived answer to make people feel good that they are spending money to send people on this stupid hiking trip.

maybe i'm just feeling bitter tonight. maybe i just wanted to complain.



ANYHOW. i've been working on doing things for my hall. i love it! I made a green "welcome home" sign for the wall that they see right when they come in. And then on the front of our hall door it says "therefore, if anyone is in Christ he is a new creation...." and then below the welcome home sign it will say "the old is gone, the new has come!" yaaay i love it. Then have some quotes from Switchfoot, Copeland and Brandtson randomly around the hall. And Jeremiah 29:11. And this quote i found at the store that i love "I hope i never get so used to the world that i never think it wonderful". yaaaay. it's great.

Then i made personalized plastic cups for my girls.. and i would tell you the contents of them, but i'm afraid Tai will read this and see what is waiting for her and i want it to be a surprise. so more on that later.

that is all. we've been having pa training in the morning. this is seriuos business and i don't know what i've gotten myself into. ah well.

hey natalie- "... here's to something more.."

Sunday, August 17, 2003

 
two questions for this evening:

how do people even hook it up?

and why does everyone have a stupid boyfriend?




haha and to make my mood even more complicated.. i heard this on the radio tonight (sunny 1520!) and i love this song. and i think i love frankie.

"when we're out together
dancing cheek to cheek"
-Frankie S.

 
i write about the stupidest, most trivial things, but if you didn't want to read about it, you wouldn't come here. so ... uh.. i don't know where i was going with that sentence.

at the end of church today we sang "in my life lord, be glorified.." and on the third verse it was "in Your church, Lord, be glorified..." and i started crying. I absolutely hate the fact that Christians in themselves are so divided. I hate that people think they are better than other Christians because they "get it". I hate that poeople dislike each other, other denominations, organizations, etc because of the smallest things. because people aren't cool enough, because they're not all the same.

today i was leaving church and walking to my car.... our church has a small paved lot, and then a lot behind that that is all gravel, and behind the gravel lot is still our church property but grass and some trees. It was quite odd cause I took a whiff of those trees and was really reminded of walkabout. and then i got into my 1980 Volvo and smelled my car smell.. which i love. It was like two worlds coming together.

man my car smelled good today. i liiiiiked it.

my little kiddie cousins are coming toniiiiiiiight! i'm so excited, i love them so much. Stephanie is 6, Ryan is 2 1/2, and Lauren is about eight months. Aiieee. They are the cousins that i spent the summer with last year, i lived in their house and worked for their dad (who is my actual cousin, the kids are second cousins, or whatever you call it). anyway. i love these kids... they seem more like my nieces or nephews than cousins, just cause i've spent so much time with them now. I love stephanie cause she is bouncy and she has dimples and difficult brown hair. She has a funny toothy grin and has a tiny speech impediment. she talks with her hands. Ryan is has this gorgeous light red hair and never cries if he falls down. He can hit himself on ANYTHING and he always gets up fighting. he's going to be a big smiling teddy bear type of guy just like his dad. I love that kid so much, i want a boy just like him. And Lauren is Lauren- she has gorgeous auburn hair and i don't know much of her personality yet, but she sure is cute. She wasn't around when i was there last summer (because well, she was born in december), so i haven't spent a lot of time with her.

I can't wait to see them, and to have stephanie yell "MEGHAN!" and come running towards me and i scoop her up (and i'm sad that she's getting so big i won't be able to scoop her up soon)... and to have Ryan just exclaim "ahhhh ennn!!" and run towards me and i scoop him up... and flip him around upside down and such... AGHH i'm so excited.
"yeah
it hardly matters
it doesn't matter"
- mates... o'..... state

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