Thursday, September 23, 2004
Last night should have contained a good night's sleep. I fell asleep before 11:30, and my alarm clock was set for (don't ask questions) 8:24. However, after I fell asleep I woke up at 12:50, 2, 4-something, 6-something, 7-something, 7-something again, and finally i just got up at 8 o'clock.
I had to leave by ten am to get to my practicum site at 10:30. I was there for a half an hour, left a little after 11am, drove back to where school is, but went to my bass lesson (and was late for it) which was scheduled at 11:30.
That went until 12:30. I rushed back to school, changed my clothes, slapped together a pbj sandwich and had class from 12:50 until 2:30. I came home and cleaned (and was on the internet a little), then went to a meeting with Dennis at 3:30. I was there until 4:10, came home, packed up my stuff, and drove quickly over to my babysitting job where i was from 5pm until 9:40.
Now there are a bunch of people in my living room. I'm going to ignore that fact and go to bed.
"we never met, you and i. we were so far inside, we were so far inside one another."-mewithoutYou
I had to leave by ten am to get to my practicum site at 10:30. I was there for a half an hour, left a little after 11am, drove back to where school is, but went to my bass lesson (and was late for it) which was scheduled at 11:30.
That went until 12:30. I rushed back to school, changed my clothes, slapped together a pbj sandwich and had class from 12:50 until 2:30. I came home and cleaned (and was on the internet a little), then went to a meeting with Dennis at 3:30. I was there until 4:10, came home, packed up my stuff, and drove quickly over to my babysitting job where i was from 5pm until 9:40.
Now there are a bunch of people in my living room. I'm going to ignore that fact and go to bed.
"we never met, you and i. we were so far inside, we were so far inside one another."-mewithoutYou
I had my first bass lesson today. Things went well and he said i did pretty well on my sight reading for not having really played all summer. That was reassuring. It feels really good to play bass again under some tutelage (?), and at the very least- just play his bass... it's so nice and has nice tone and is just altogether wonderful. It's a much better size for me than the school's bass.
I had my first meeting with my primary reader for 410 yesterday. I'll be talking about 410 on here a lot, I'm sure, over the next few months so i better go ahead and explain what 410 is. The term "four-ten" is mostly just the word around here that is short for Humanities 410 (also referred to as Hum410), a course that ends our humanities core here at my school. As a liberal arts institution we have to go through these humanities courses that... are part good and part bad.
There was no Hum110 (freshman) course when I was freshman, but I think they've added it since. So you do that, and then Hum210 your sophomore year. There are actually choices your sophomore year and you can take Hum210-Science and Technology, Hum211-War and Peace, or Hum212-which has something to do with environment. Everyone uses the same basic text "The Theory of Human Nature" which includes selections from philosophers such as Plato and Socrates, Augustine and Kierkegaard (i believe). I had Hum210 and hated it. The end.
The Hum310 is called "Faith, living, and learning" and is a much better course (in my estimation). Each professor teaches it a different way and has some different texts, but I think everyone reads "circle of quiet" by L'engle, and "the chosen" by potok. We start discussing those three elements and paradoxes, etc. etc. My class consisted of about 13 other people and an awesome (one of my favorites) professor. It was a feely-good-ask-tough-questions time and i wanted to cry when it was over.
So hum410 is supposed to bring all of your education together, basically. I will still have two semesters of school left after this, but i'm a senior and am just going to get it out of my way. 410 is basically just one paper you write over the course of the semester. However, it is a paper that is based on one paradox of your choosing. This paradox must be a universal human condition and must be illustrated in an example from your major. Then you must also tie it to two totally different disciplines-one from arts and one from sciences. I am a human development major and i think I am going to tie mine to some sort of art like visual art, music, or film, and sociology.
So i met with my primary reader yesterday and i meet with my secondary reader (that awesome professor mentioned above) in a few minutes. My primary reader, Gary, had already met with a number of his paper-writers, and had not signed off on a single proposal. My paradox i want to use is "we (as humans) seek after what we already have". Gary said that while he struggled with that thought, and couldn't write a paper like that himself, and was a little confused by it (and made me confused in the process of talking about it), he signed off on it! So now i meet with Dennis and see what he comes up with.
My assignment between now and the next time I meet with Gary is try to find an art that i can see this expressed in, and somehow outline my paper or write a short essay without doing research (just stuff from my head). We'll see.
The two cds I cannot stop listening to are: mewithoutYou's "a-->b life" (in the car), and "ben folds-"rockin' the suburbs" (in the house, with my roommates).
I had my first meeting with my primary reader for 410 yesterday. I'll be talking about 410 on here a lot, I'm sure, over the next few months so i better go ahead and explain what 410 is. The term "four-ten" is mostly just the word around here that is short for Humanities 410 (also referred to as Hum410), a course that ends our humanities core here at my school. As a liberal arts institution we have to go through these humanities courses that... are part good and part bad.
There was no Hum110 (freshman) course when I was freshman, but I think they've added it since. So you do that, and then Hum210 your sophomore year. There are actually choices your sophomore year and you can take Hum210-Science and Technology, Hum211-War and Peace, or Hum212-which has something to do with environment. Everyone uses the same basic text "The Theory of Human Nature" which includes selections from philosophers such as Plato and Socrates, Augustine and Kierkegaard (i believe). I had Hum210 and hated it. The end.
The Hum310 is called "Faith, living, and learning" and is a much better course (in my estimation). Each professor teaches it a different way and has some different texts, but I think everyone reads "circle of quiet" by L'engle, and "the chosen" by potok. We start discussing those three elements and paradoxes, etc. etc. My class consisted of about 13 other people and an awesome (one of my favorites) professor. It was a feely-good-ask-tough-questions time and i wanted to cry when it was over.
So hum410 is supposed to bring all of your education together, basically. I will still have two semesters of school left after this, but i'm a senior and am just going to get it out of my way. 410 is basically just one paper you write over the course of the semester. However, it is a paper that is based on one paradox of your choosing. This paradox must be a universal human condition and must be illustrated in an example from your major. Then you must also tie it to two totally different disciplines-one from arts and one from sciences. I am a human development major and i think I am going to tie mine to some sort of art like visual art, music, or film, and sociology.
So i met with my primary reader yesterday and i meet with my secondary reader (that awesome professor mentioned above) in a few minutes. My primary reader, Gary, had already met with a number of his paper-writers, and had not signed off on a single proposal. My paradox i want to use is "we (as humans) seek after what we already have". Gary said that while he struggled with that thought, and couldn't write a paper like that himself, and was a little confused by it (and made me confused in the process of talking about it), he signed off on it! So now i meet with Dennis and see what he comes up with.
My assignment between now and the next time I meet with Gary is try to find an art that i can see this expressed in, and somehow outline my paper or write a short essay without doing research (just stuff from my head). We'll see.
The two cds I cannot stop listening to are: mewithoutYou's "a-->b life" (in the car), and "ben folds-"rockin' the suburbs" (in the house, with my roommates).
Sunday, September 19, 2004
God:
what do i do when everything falls apart?
i'm tired. some physically, but so, so deeply emotionally tired.
what do i do when everything falls apart?
i'm tired. some physically, but so, so deeply emotionally tired.
It's about time i realized that i don't always have to having fun. Or that just because it's a sluggish afternoon, and i'm not really talking to anyone, and i'm listening to sad music, doesn't mean my life stinks.
It's about time i realized that nothing revolves around me. that my sad feelings are fleeting in the light of what is eternal. my life is much more than what i do.
It's about time i realized that nothing revolves around me. that my sad feelings are fleeting in the light of what is eternal. my life is much more than what i do.
"maybe she was hiding because she wanted to be found. She wanted to be found"-mewithoutYou
recent purchases in the music department:
ben folds- rocking the suburbs
weezer-green
mewithoutYou- a-->b life
starflyer59- can't stop eating
twothirtyeight- libros de recuerdos (or whatever)
My left shoulder hurts. and it hurts especially on sunday mornings when i play my bass.
i love roommates who dance around to ben folds. i love it when i come home from working and i find two of my roommates on the floor, laughing really hard, playing some weird game of "i'm going to try and flip you over!", and one of them is wearing long johns under her clothes. We are poor and trying not to use the heater. i like friends who will have a good talk with me, and listen, on a ride back from seattle. i like my mom because of her heart. i like my dad because he always tries to help me (and my house). i like the idea of learning guitar. i like that bass lessons start soon. i like getting sweaters from my house and bringing them back to school. i like my new "design your own tumbler" with pictures of copeland and my niece, ticket stubs from the blinside/mewithoutYou show and garden state, and an awesome quote from alice cooper. i like new jeans. i like my sweater vest and the barrette in my hair.
i do not like waking up and feeling like i'm sleeping outside, because i'm so cold.
"everybody knows it hurts to grow up"-ben folds
recent purchases in the music department:
ben folds- rocking the suburbs
weezer-green
mewithoutYou- a-->b life
starflyer59- can't stop eating
twothirtyeight- libros de recuerdos (or whatever)
My left shoulder hurts. and it hurts especially on sunday mornings when i play my bass.
i love roommates who dance around to ben folds. i love it when i come home from working and i find two of my roommates on the floor, laughing really hard, playing some weird game of "i'm going to try and flip you over!", and one of them is wearing long johns under her clothes. We are poor and trying not to use the heater. i like friends who will have a good talk with me, and listen, on a ride back from seattle. i like my mom because of her heart. i like my dad because he always tries to help me (and my house). i like the idea of learning guitar. i like that bass lessons start soon. i like getting sweaters from my house and bringing them back to school. i like my new "design your own tumbler" with pictures of copeland and my niece, ticket stubs from the blinside/mewithoutYou show and garden state, and an awesome quote from alice cooper. i like new jeans. i like my sweater vest and the barrette in my hair.
i do not like waking up and feeling like i'm sleeping outside, because i'm so cold.
"everybody knows it hurts to grow up"-ben folds
