Monday, January 27, 2003
Yeah. wow. This is totally unlike me, but i'm longing for summer. Maybe because school is beginning to overwhelm me, and summer is just relaxation and a mindless job.
Someone just asked me if i was going to go to cornerstone, i told him no. This was just after i was reading over Seth's old blogging, and i went back to July to read the things he wrote. I was SO mean. I look back on that and wonder how i could've done something like that. And then i look and say "well what SHOULD I have done?" and... i think of cornerstone and think of that and ... I guess it makes me want a real summer. One where i'm not separated from my family. One where I'm not making life decisions. One where I'm not hurting someone, and one where I'm not incredibly lonely.
I want a summer to be free. Do you read this Seth? I'm sorry. I haven't told you that lately, but I am. I'm sorry I didn't take that walk with you. You probably don't care anymore, but I am sorry.
Someone just asked me if i was going to go to cornerstone, i told him no. This was just after i was reading over Seth's old blogging, and i went back to July to read the things he wrote. I was SO mean. I look back on that and wonder how i could've done something like that. And then i look and say "well what SHOULD I have done?" and... i think of cornerstone and think of that and ... I guess it makes me want a real summer. One where i'm not separated from my family. One where I'm not making life decisions. One where I'm not hurting someone, and one where I'm not incredibly lonely.
I want a summer to be free. Do you read this Seth? I'm sorry. I haven't told you that lately, but I am. I'm sorry I didn't take that walk with you. You probably don't care anymore, but I am sorry.
Sunday, January 26, 2003
i don't really have anything significant to talk about. This is just going to be a rambling of thoughts. I'm pretty bored and doing homework doesn't appeal right now.
Last year there was a girl at our school who was in a really bad car accident. The had to bring her back to life twice. They thought she would always be disabled, or paralyzed, or something. She made a full recovery and is back at school this year (as of this last fall). Her recovery was so amazing, and everyone on campus was just in awe of God about it. She came last spring semester (her accident was in september), and stood in front of us as a testament to what God can do. Last night we were sitting at the basketball game, and the lady in front of me (who works in student development) got a call from our vice president. It turns out this girl's sister (who had already graduated from my school) was killed in a car accident yesterday afternoon. nobody can believe it, and i think we're just in shock. I never knew the girl, but i can't imagine what their family is going through. On top of all this, their mom is pretty sick, i don't know with what... but man.
I spent the day today with my parents. My whole family (including brother and sister in law) all had lunch together after church, and then my parents and i went over to my parents' friends' house to watch the super bowl, and just sit around and talk. That was pretty nice. It was relaxing anyway. i did a little bit of homework.
Nick and I were getting along amazingly well yesterday. Usually one of us says something that ticks the other person off, but yesterday we were just the nicest and kindest people to each other. it was kinda odd. But we talked a lot. Darned boy though, cause he kept me up an hour and a half past my bed time (i have to get up really early on sundays) and i overslept my alarm, and so i didn't get to take a shower this morning, i had to rush out the door to church :(. YUCK.. i felt icky all day. of course, now i want to talk to Nick, and i can stay up late, and he's nowhere to be seen.
i was going to say something else, and now i can't think of what it is. i got a sliver today while i was moving a chair in sunday school. That hurt, it was right in my index finger, and i had to play the bass right after that. ouch.
I have way too many freakin' cds. They don't fit in my juice bottle crate. There are some stacked on top. And those are the ones I am not ashamed to have out in the open, and not counting the two cases in my cars. Or my copied cds. Hm.
We are having a poop contest on our hall. Natalie is winning with ten poops since late tuesday night!! SHE'S FULL OF CRAP!!! yeep. get control of yourself, woman.
I am continually pissed off about Walkabout. Walkabout's a think you do when you are on leadership. For a week before school starts all the people on leadership go "camping" on Mt. Adams. This includes spelunking (which also includes shimmying through a tiny tunnel on your own), rock climbing, a 24 hour solo (AAH!), a 5 mile run, among other things. It's supposed to build teamwork and bonding, and learning how to get along with other's in your groups whose abilities do match your own.
The reason I did not apply to become a PA this year, was because of walkabout. I do NOT want to go on it. But in November God totally told me that I should apply to be a PA. So, i'm going to apply. I was talking with my mom about how I really hate the idea of walkabout, but i have to do it. And there's nobody to talk to about how stupid it is, cause all the development people are just going to tell me that i'll grow from it, and refer me to people who hated the idea of it at first, and had a great time. I just think they are seriously excluding a huge number of people who wouldn't want to go on that, from leadership, and I think that's kinda discriminatory. Anyway. I almost cried about that today. I feel like the student development department is so inclusive, and reclusive and reserved for certain people, and if i come in to say anything.. what's it going to do? I'm still going to have to go to walkabout. I don't want to be the one that makes them get rid of it, tons of people would be so mad at me. Yet, i don't want to go. I can just see myself crying the whole week. the whole freakin' week. Blah. now i'm down.
"God gave you style and gave you grace
God put a smile upon your face"-Coldplay
Last year there was a girl at our school who was in a really bad car accident. The had to bring her back to life twice. They thought she would always be disabled, or paralyzed, or something. She made a full recovery and is back at school this year (as of this last fall). Her recovery was so amazing, and everyone on campus was just in awe of God about it. She came last spring semester (her accident was in september), and stood in front of us as a testament to what God can do. Last night we were sitting at the basketball game, and the lady in front of me (who works in student development) got a call from our vice president. It turns out this girl's sister (who had already graduated from my school) was killed in a car accident yesterday afternoon. nobody can believe it, and i think we're just in shock. I never knew the girl, but i can't imagine what their family is going through. On top of all this, their mom is pretty sick, i don't know with what... but man.
I spent the day today with my parents. My whole family (including brother and sister in law) all had lunch together after church, and then my parents and i went over to my parents' friends' house to watch the super bowl, and just sit around and talk. That was pretty nice. It was relaxing anyway. i did a little bit of homework.
Nick and I were getting along amazingly well yesterday. Usually one of us says something that ticks the other person off, but yesterday we were just the nicest and kindest people to each other. it was kinda odd. But we talked a lot. Darned boy though, cause he kept me up an hour and a half past my bed time (i have to get up really early on sundays) and i overslept my alarm, and so i didn't get to take a shower this morning, i had to rush out the door to church :(. YUCK.. i felt icky all day. of course, now i want to talk to Nick, and i can stay up late, and he's nowhere to be seen.
i was going to say something else, and now i can't think of what it is. i got a sliver today while i was moving a chair in sunday school. That hurt, it was right in my index finger, and i had to play the bass right after that. ouch.
I have way too many freakin' cds. They don't fit in my juice bottle crate. There are some stacked on top. And those are the ones I am not ashamed to have out in the open, and not counting the two cases in my cars. Or my copied cds. Hm.
We are having a poop contest on our hall. Natalie is winning with ten poops since late tuesday night!! SHE'S FULL OF CRAP!!! yeep. get control of yourself, woman.
I am continually pissed off about Walkabout. Walkabout's a think you do when you are on leadership. For a week before school starts all the people on leadership go "camping" on Mt. Adams. This includes spelunking (which also includes shimmying through a tiny tunnel on your own), rock climbing, a 24 hour solo (AAH!), a 5 mile run, among other things. It's supposed to build teamwork and bonding, and learning how to get along with other's in your groups whose abilities do match your own.
The reason I did not apply to become a PA this year, was because of walkabout. I do NOT want to go on it. But in November God totally told me that I should apply to be a PA. So, i'm going to apply. I was talking with my mom about how I really hate the idea of walkabout, but i have to do it. And there's nobody to talk to about how stupid it is, cause all the development people are just going to tell me that i'll grow from it, and refer me to people who hated the idea of it at first, and had a great time. I just think they are seriously excluding a huge number of people who wouldn't want to go on that, from leadership, and I think that's kinda discriminatory. Anyway. I almost cried about that today. I feel like the student development department is so inclusive, and reclusive and reserved for certain people, and if i come in to say anything.. what's it going to do? I'm still going to have to go to walkabout. I don't want to be the one that makes them get rid of it, tons of people would be so mad at me. Yet, i don't want to go. I can just see myself crying the whole week. the whole freakin' week. Blah. now i'm down.
"God gave you style and gave you grace
God put a smile upon your face"-Coldplay
